WHAT IT IS
On a privately-owned, left-handed dirt track, some eight and a half furlongs long, just outside Greensburg Indiana was where the magic happened for a second time in as many races. On a hazy, lazy Sunday morning in August, eight thoroughbreds lined up at the starting gate, their owners mulling around the in-field in nervous anticipation. As soon as the last horse was gated, the starting pistol sounded, the gates flew open and five stallions, two geldings and one mare bolted down the track. Molly’s Turn was by far and away the favorite. The previous year she ran the Indiana Derby, coming in second behind the state champion by a quarter length and she had only grown stronger since then. The three-year old’s forte was to break early, run hard and let the other horses eat her dust. On this day the pattern did not deviate, but when the pack was coming out of the backstretch, the two nearly identical grey/white geldings, made their move. Molly’s Turn pounded the track hard, her head dropped slightly and she dug deep, but as the home stretch loomed before them, she could see the pair inching toward her, one on the outside the other a couple of feet to the inside. Down the home stretch the three warriors battled hard and with less than a furlong to go, no distance separated the three. Cheers and laughter erupted among the owners, as the finish line revealed the geldings’ neck and neck with one another and Molly’s Turn a close second. It would be the second neck and neck finish by the pair in the last two weeks. Perhaps more interesting than the race, was the peculiar behavior of one of the horses as he rounded the final turn heading into the home stretch.
Tenth Conspiracy was a late addition to the race, his job was to fill out the field, give a reasonable last place finish, all the while offering an air of authenticity to the race. As the pack mutated into a mob of predictability; hooves pounding, dust swirling and muscles straining, Tenth Conspiracy pulled up abruptly and watched the others disappear down the home stretch. Gestures of superiority, robust tail flapping and exaggerated nostril exhaling was not what he wanted to witness because this repeating posturing led to no new horizons, no tantalizing discoveries but laid bare a paralyzing gratefulness that winners extol and losers are confused by what they might be missing. This act of the grateful, is the one that corals the parameters of a prosperous and opulent life while perplexed by those who let gratefulness slip through their fingertips like some dying religion. They make no connection and they make no reflection because theirs is a soft dreamlike state where good deeds are done by good people and gratefulness flows through their veins and never spills on to the street. And if it should ever spill, the concoction might be misdiagnosed as a form of equality spoken from a preacher’s pulpit or a CEO’s comfortable chair or an actor’s naïve world view. Tenth Conspiracy wondered if he should be grateful, he never won a race, never had a flowering wreath draped around his neck, and never entered the winner’s circle but there was still those who insisted that existence, no matter what shackles accompanied it, was firm ground for gratefulness. On this day, he decided the whole notion of gratefulness was for the lucky few and he would stroll through the countryside and leave this race for gratefulness behind.
WHAT IT IS NOT
A bored lunatic from a movie film crew near the south-eastern tip of Missouri raised his cross bow, in its sights a grazing Tenth Conspiracy was unaware of what was about to happen to him. A searing pain bolted through his neck, paralyzing his legs, causing him to plummeted to the ground with such force that the arrow protruding from his neck snapped off leaving blood spewing in all directions. As adrenaline exploded throughout his body, he tried to get back on his feet, catching a glimpse of the carpenter’s assistant reloading his cross bow. For Tenth Conspiracy it was show time, an expression he loathed as it conjured up a banal tryst that was meant to be a surrogate to something genuine and tangible. This casualty of candor and this victim of cruelty was set upon by a moron, meaningless and distasteful, and placed in an absurd reality where no amount of supervision would find the keys to the gate. Perhaps he thought of himself as an extra in a movie, a Hollywood movie where tedious storytelling and bland narratives are the grease that keeps the theatre reels spinning. At any rate, the horse’s horse was about to muster that which no 2nd or 3rd or 4th take could ever aspire to – that dash of realism floating in a sea of conviction where what matters is not bodies in seats but bodies of work well done. The dowdiness of this glamorous artform divulges its association to strength made trivial, as it applies its biases to be gobbled up by the masses who are offered up no alternatives and no alterations. Tenth Conspiracy’s alternative was to divorce this glamorous artform and summon enough herculean strength to get back on his feet and head for anywhere. The second arrow got haplessly entwined in the horse’s tail and the third malfunctioned, injuring the shooter. Tenth Conspiracy’s run was sloppy and jagged, ending when he got tangled up in a pile of barbed wire left carelessly at a field’s edge by a local farmer. Lying in a heap, he thought about the many races, the many losses and the certain circumstance that brought him to this place. His restfulness, though uneasy, cried out to place where he should have always been, that being a place where the trappings of accolades served to potently twist the mind into believing what is served up is never enough, should never be settled for and the more is deserved and always attainable. As he drifted, this peacefulness we hear about, overcame him and he thought he heard soft voices whispering to him in his final moments.
Mrs. B. quickly ordered the translucent man to backtrack a quarter mile, pick up as many of the strange orange plants as he could carry and return immediately. She knew she could save this one.